Tuesday, September 8, 2015

September

This post really has nothing to do with September.  I could write about how much I miss the Fall weather, but it isn't really true this year.  For one thing, I'm moving to a state with seasons in the winter, so I'm going to enjoy every last minute of the all-year-warmth that comes with being in Arizona.  For another, I've gotten good at doing all the Fall things I usually blame on the change of weather.  I'm more physically active right now (which is something I usually get inspired to be when the weather gets more crisp), I'm writing more and feeling more motivated to get out of the lazy summer habits I've formed through the warmer months.  And I'm okay with the fact that I won't be wearing shoes or jeans or sweaters for the foreseeable future.

I also want time to slow down...when we move, so much will change.  The organization I work for is perfect right now.  Perfect people, perfect amount of productivity, perfect amount of adult interaction (if you're a parent, you totally get what I mean by that), perfect tasks for what I love to do...and it's all going to be different when I'm doing it all by myself in Colorado.  There will be no coworkers, except for emails and phone calls and conference calls...and none of that is the same.

I'm not, by any means, complaining.  I'm not sad that this job, with the people I work with, has become my family away from home, but I am sad that I'm leaving all of that in a few months.  They're the only friends I have here, and when I move there, I won't be going out and making new friends (unless I want to get involved in the military spouse clubs and crap, which is really not appealing to me at all...I'm not knocking it, it's just not my thing).

Obviously, I'm underestimating my ability to cope just fine with being alone.  There's a very good chance I'll thrive in that environment.  I get so much more done when I'm alone.  I'll get to set my own pace, prioritize my day to day goals, do a load of laundry when it's overflowing, listen to my own music (not that I don't like my coworkers music, I've just never been the type to assert my own preference), catch up on all the things I say I'd do if only I had more time (like clean up the database, keep the website totally up to date, find fun things to post regularly on social media, etc.).

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Salami is such a great snack.  It's totally unhealthy and way too easy to indulge in, but also so satisfying.  And I'm going to run tomorrow, so whatever.
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So really I'm just whining.  This is how I process change.  This is how I manage to pick up my life and move it to another time zone.  It might not be the healthiest way to handle it, but it works for me. I've had a lot of experience with saying goodbye to people and places and careers...and in this particular move, I only have to say goodbye on a more muted scale.  I get to keep the relationships I have with the people I work with, I get to keep my job, for which I can't overstate my gratitude...I may even get to come back to Arizona regularly throughout the year to be a real part of the team again.  I'll do my part from Colorado, but I know and they know that it won't be the same.

Will you look at that...it's almost 10 pm.  I almost didn't make it past 8:30, but my 4 year old (soon to be 5 year old) was still trying to get away with shenanigans in her room.

That's enough for tonight, I suppose.