NaNoWriMo 2016 - Day 7 (and briefly, Day 6)

I wrote yesterday, I just didn't write here yesterday.  I didn't even realize until I'd decided to call it quits tonight and came here to bow out when I saw that I hadn't even posted an update yesterday.  It was a good day, too.  Full day of cleaning the house, writing, and exercising (something I've been lacking in more lately).  But I must have assumed I'd get around to posting here at some point and today I must've miss-remembered that I had.

Anyways...I'm so tired right now.  I had a full day (with crappy sleep last night)...worked an insane amount in the 8ish hours of my work day (one of those days where I'm rushing through one thing so I can get it done and move on to the next...which takes a lot out of anyone...right?).  Then had to work on jewelry tonight after picking up the girls from school.  Then came here to write at 10pm.  So I'm not even feeling back for getting under the 1,667 word count total for the day.  It was close, and my average is still higher than that, so whatever.

Still loving my story.

Good night.

NaNoWriMo2016 - Day 5

I got to sleep in late this morning.  It's rare that I get up anywhere past 7:30 in the morning and today it was after 8, which is unheard of.  Not that I didn't wake up a few times beforehand...like in the middle of the night when our 6 year old came in the room complaining that she's afraid of ghosts (we made the mistake of letting her watch the new Ghostbusters movie with us last night...she went back to bed when I negotiated that she could keep her door open and our door open, in case she needed a quick getaway to a safe place in the event that a ghost showed up in her room) and at 6:45 this morning when our younger one came and crawled into bed with me for 10 minutes before I convinced her she needed more sleep (it worked, which is also very rare).

After breakfast (made by the newly returned husband) and a fun trip to stores to get unneeded things (like the ingredients to no-bake cookies, also made by the newly returned husband) (and the ingredients to cereal mix, made by me, currently in the oven)...we got home and had lunch, then I got my younger girl to bed for a nap and I went out to Barnes n Noble for 3.5 hours to catch up on my word count.

I got to 2,550 words and feel mostly satisfied with the quality of what I added to my story.  I'm still feeling like I have plenty of content and plenty of story line left to fill the pages.  And I like my idea...the female protagonist makes "memory movies" in the future...no one spends real time with anyone else...everything happens remotely with virtual reality...weddings, birthdays, anniversaries...and she creates them out of nothing but photos, video clips, and requests from her clients.  This way they can pretend they spent real time together with their new spouse or family celebrating a birthday, or friends celebrating a graduation, when really they only ever interact online.
Human population numbers are low, birthrate is low, etc. But for the most part, people are happy.  The female protagonist isn't though.  And the male protagonist wants everyone to be happy.  He wants to become the next president, and he probably will.  He wants to do a good job, fix the country's problems, etc.  The female and male protagonist get "matched" which means they're considered compatible by a system that reads and analyzes their user profiles, their online activity, etc.  They've both had unsuccessful matches in the past and are both pretty much sure the system is a joke, but they like each other, despite themselves.

She gets framed for doing something that's illegal in the future (lying online). Gets kicked offline.  He knows how dangerous it is to be offline and goes to look for her. Her best friend, the one who framed her to get her kicked offline, also comes to find her.  She tells her she's met communities offline that are full of loving, good, innocent and harmless people, they're repopulating the world and she didn't know another way to get them help.  She didn't want to put her friend in harms way, but knew she could influence the one person that could help these people.

Just realized I basically wrote another synopsis, which is basically the same as what I posted here a few days ago.  Oh well!

I love November (not sure if I'll be feeling the same way on day 15, haha).

NaNoWriMo - Day 4

I came up about 450 words short today, but I'm feeling okay about it.  I mean, tomorrow's a Saturday and my husband is finally home so I am completely at liberty to leave the house during my younger daughter's nap for up to 3 hours (or 3 months, if we want to be completely fair about it)...so I plan to set a higher word count goal for the weekend to get caught up and get ahead.

So for tonight (i'm getting dirty looks as we turn on the new Ghostbusters movie and I'm trying to hastily type this entry)...here you go:

NaNoWriMo Day 3 - I am so tired.

My husband got home from a three month training in California today.  After the very crappy amount of sleep I got last night and the ability to celebrate the end of single parenting, I had mentally decided I wouldn't write tonight.  Then he went to bed at around 9 PM and I thought, well, there's no reason not to write.  So I did.

And now it's time for bed.

Yay me (even if I was literally falling asleep as I was typing full sentences)...

Good night.

NaNoWriMo 2016, Day 2

Today was a lot tougher.  When I went to pick up my younger kiddo from daycare they said she's been feeling yucky and that they wanted to check her temperature before I took her home.  101.1.  Poor baby girl (she'll be 3 in January).  I gave her ibuprofen around 6:30 after she laid pathetically on the couch for an hour looking like she wanted to die.  I'm not the type to hold off on the medicine, I was just completely blanking on the fact that she should have something to bring the fever down.  Within almost 30 minutes of taking her medicine she was up eating crackers and drinking milk (yea yea, milk was a bad idea).  She went to bed around 8:30 seeming fine, with a cool forehead and all.  Then at 11:15, when I was about 1,200 in on my word count for the night, I hear coughing coming from one of their rooms.  I'm only hopeful for a second that it's just a mild cough, but then I hear the tell-tale sounds of flemmy coughing...knowing without a doubt that I'm about to be confronted with the thick smell of vomit.  Poor kid threw up all over herself in the bed.  I'll stop detailing the level of grossness because I could definitely go on, and even I can't stand the thought of it.  My hands feel swollen and stiff from all the hand-washing.  She had to get in the bath and was shaking like crazy...I felt so bad for her....it was all through her hair so there was no avoiding the tub.  I bleached it after she got out, which I'm sure plays a factor in how uncomfortably swollen and stiff/dry my fingers are right now.  Luckily for me, and maybe not so luckily for him, my husband gets home tomorrow from his 3 month training in California.  I might only work half the day so I can sleep.  I'm really hoping I don't catch whatever she has.  I don't know what she has, to be honest.  Usually when any of us get the actual stomach bug, we don't get a fever with it, but maybe this is an exception?  She had her flu shot a few weeks ago so I'm assuming it's not that.  She took a bath last night and drank a lot of the gross bath water (she does it all the time, even though I beg her not to).

So after all that, I came here to document that I still hit my word count goal for the day.  Exactly 1,667 words.  It was 1,666 but I added in an unnecessary word when I saw that I was only 1 away from the magic number.

Please don't let my daughter puke anymore...please help her feel better soon!! :( Poor little honey (that's what she would say to a "sick" doll).

NaNoWriMo End of Day 1

I'm here, feeling extremely optimistic about this new project and my first day's accomplishments.  I always feel the most hesitant just before I'm starting something new.  I have this idea in my head of how I want it to go, and I'm usually always afraid the whole thing will crash and burn before the end of Chapter 1. But tonight's beginning went better than I could have hoped and I feel like I'm off to a great start.  This story is off to a great start.  This is my synopsis:

And my Day 1 Totals:

It's already after 11 and I sat down to start this at around 8:15.  Almost three hours for 2,000 words.  Ouch.  But I really don't need to average that many EVERY day, as long as I write every day for the next 29 days.  

It's happening.  I feel really, really good about this.  

And then you blink, and it's November

I'm committing myself again this year to participating in NaNoWriMo.  Fifty-thousand words in 30 days.  I have been outlining an idea for the past few weeks, an idea that surfaced over a year ago and now I feel the same unavoidable urge to get it out as I did with my first manuscript.  It's set in a future where people stop interacting in person and the human population keeps dropping.  It'll be set from the point of view of two people (man/woman).

I'm listening to the NaNoWriPod podcast and feeling very frustrated with myself for not staying up until midnight last night to write.  It never even crossed my mind, to be honest.  After trick-or-treating with the kids and trying to fit in some mind numbing TV time, which followed a full day of work and editing my WIP from several years ago (I've been sending queries out again and have already been getting those form letter rejections, trying not to take it personal again), I was just exhausted.  Actually, it's probably best I didn't stay up, since my 2 year old crawled in my bed at 1:45 AM for about 10 minutes before I forced myself to convince her that sleeping in her own bed would be better.  It actually worked...she stayed in her own bed the rest of the night, but that short middle of the night interruption is something I'm not used to now that both my kids sleep through the night.

In conclusion, for better or worse, here's to another month of committing my free time to writing! Good luck to anyone else starting this adventure today!!

I am keeping a food journal

I always feel more invested in things like this when I put it out there in the world...so here it is.  In 2008, I kept a food diary (on Calorie Count) and I lost more than 20 pounds.  I have had 2 kids since then and fluctuated way back up again and way back down again (with the help of the Whole30 diet...which I completed, though it was not easy and I'm very hesitant to try it again...one major reason is that I love alcohol and the thought of going 30 days without it again just seems ridiculous).

So with running (and training for) a marathon, I got into the habit of eating whatever I wanted.  And I may not have gained much weight through that (and ate A LOT), I definitely didn't lose any.  So now that I'm running less (only between 3 and 4.5 miles per run...but I've been running more often, almost daily)...I'm still eating a lot and feeling pretty down on myself.  I also drink too much...not for alcoholic type standards, but there are a lot of calories in wine, so having 2-3 glasses on any given night AND snacking regularly like I'm some kind of calorie burning queen is not a good combination for me, or my body.  I'm still at a healthy weight, but I suspect I'm at the high end of healthy...borderline overweight.

That's not who I identify as...and my clothes agree. So I started the food journal yesterday, this time with My Fitness Pal because I have a Garmin VivoActive HR and they play well together.  I ate over 2,500 calories (that's including the 2-3 glasses of wine) and then gave up tracking what I was eating.  But this morning, instead of feeling discouraged, I woke up feeling determined.  I've done this before.  I've done a million things harder than this.  Not to brag, but I've pumped (breastmilk) while driving...I've breastfed and pumped while at work for 2 full years of my life.  I've trained for and ran a half and full marathon.  I completed one Whole30 (which really felt as hard for me as my first two examples combined). I've written 2 full books, one during NaNoWriMo (not that I've been able to get either published, but still..).  I've definitely had a crapload of determination to accomplish goals that I've set my mind to...so I can absolutely watch what I eat, set a calorie deficit goal, and lose 5-10 pounds (15 would be ideal).  Right? Right??

Yea...so, I'm off to the base with my kids so I can run on a trail before getting some healthy food.  I'll try checking in again with my progress soon (of course, if you don't hear from me, that's probably not a good sign).

I'm an emotional mess.

My 5 year old daughter and I were watching Disney short films this evening on Netflix and The Little Matchgirl came on...I must not have looked up until the very end when she was lighting her matches and seeing amazing things like food and a warm place to sleep.  Then she freezes to death and a nice old woman spirit (grandmother?) comes and carries her soul away....can you blame me for being emotional??

I spent the following 15 minutes trying to make my daughter understand how lucky she has it (in between choking sobs).  She didn't get it at all, which is good on the one hand, but also so depressing on the other.  I hope I didn't just scar her in some way.  I hope she'll be a little more cognizant of the fact that not everyone has the same opportunities as she does.  She's still so young...but she's well past the point that children living in poverty have already come to fully understand their situation.

Now I can't remember what I was planning to write about earlier this evening.  Oh...NaNoWriMo...that's a no go for me this year.  With work, jewelry, husband being gone, kids, house, moving in December....there was no way I'd be able to accomplish writing 50,000 words of a new novel without needing to be committed for some sort of mental breakdown by December 1.  I do have goals, however.  I'd like to really get a good chunk (if not all) of editing done on the Earths Project book I wrote a few years ago.  I've edited it two times already and it still needs an overhaul..but I still have confidence in the story and the characters and I've never given up on believing that it has potential.  So if I go through it again, maybe I'll be able to start querying agents again by 2016....then maybe (oh, please!!) I can get a book published when I'm 33....my favorite number is 3 (and it's more than just a preference, I really feel like luck happens for me when there's a 3 involved).

So now that I'm emotionally drained and can barely see through my contacts, I'll go pour a glass of wine and try some mindless TV watching.  Hopefully there's a new episode of The Affair available.

Good night..

Ouch...and Saturday

My dog got a little overzealous when I was preparing him for our walk tonight and threw his head into my jaw when I was leaning down to put on his leash.  I was afraid I broke a tooth but then, when the throbbing in my entire mouth passed, I realized he only caused me to put a hole in my tongue. It's hurting a lot more now than it did right after it happened.

Sorry, gross photo, but it really, really hurt! Now it's all extra yucky looking with white patches and it hurts to talk.

Otherwise today was a really great day.  Went to the gym this morning where I took my time and spent a valiant effort working up a sweat and refreshing in some mommy time, sans children.  I ran 3 miles, walked up stairs for 20 minutes, then did some foam rolling and random strength exercises.  Took over an hour nap while the kids napped, which is rare, my body must have needed it.  After naps, we went to the pool then finished off the day with a walk and pizza.  Abby went to bed without freaking out for the first time in almost a week.  It was really great to sit down with a glass of wine without feeling guilty.  Right now my oldest is still making noise in her room, after 10, and I'm feeling slightly guilty for letting her play on her iPad too long.  

No husband wasn't horrible today.  I feel okay. They are both healthy right now, and so am I...I'm dreading the days of this separation where one or all of us gets ill with something major...I'll really struggle then...that's what I'm afraid of the most for this time apart.  Maybe we'll have the one and only Fall of our lives up to this point where none of us comes down with anything.  Sadly, I know that's very wishful thinking.

If only I could find time to write while Steve's gone.  And find something to write about.  I have random urges to spew out thousands of words towards something real, but then I remember I have no idea where to start or where to go with it even if I do come up with some glimpse of a story. I keep hoping something will reveal itself in the next week so I can do another NaNoWriMo but I'm also afraid I'll be too exhausted for it so I'm questioning whether I should even try.  All I keep doing is questioning myself.  In my journal, now here.  If I should commit to it.  If I should take a pass this year.  I keep waiting for some higher power to give me an answer.  And that's where I am...where I'll be even after I finish this post and go to bed.  No definitive decision either way.

Good night.

Today (edited to add: up to this point) was a really great day.

I should really knock on wood (I just did, for real), because I don't want some catastrophic thing to happen after I submit this post considering it's only 6:15 and both my kids are still up and I'm leaving to get pizza soon.  I guess I should say today up to this point has been a really great day.  Okay, I got really superstitious and changed the title of this post.  Whatever.

So the day started out early, like always, but it was shortly followed by pancakes, which is awesome.  They were funfetti.  I ran to Walmart (which was mostly empty at 8 am...the only way I can stand that place) to get a new tire for one of our jogging strollers...the single capacity one...then fixed the dead tire and we all piled into the car to go to Jane's first ever soccer game.  As a four year old with no experience in a team activity, she kind of sucked, but it was a lot of fun watching and getting to use our fancy camera to capture the event.  There was a lot of placating to get her through the whole thing without too many tantrums but all-in-all I think she enjoyed it and it was a good experience for her.  Abby had a great time too.

Naptime came next (yay! I always feel a little bad when I express my true feelings about naptime, but I know I'm not the only one who thinks kids were biologically inclined to nap in order to sustain the human race, because without naps, I think a lot of parents would go insane).  I went to Barnes N Noble and drank an iced coffee, read some of my Earths Project book and jotted down notes on it (why it sucked, then why it wasn't so sucky), then I wrote some of a short story I started after that one blog post a couple weeks ago...it's going well.  I even re-read a chapter of the book I wrote last year during NaNoWriMo and felt really proud of it...which made me feel a little less like I'm wasting my time (always an underlying fear I have about this thing I do).

I got home and played with my kiddos, then took Abby out in the jogging stroller that I fixed this morning...we did a slow 5K and I took a cool shower after (so refreshing).  Now I'm drinking a glass of wine and getting ready to leave to get the pizza.  So that brings us up to speed...great day so far, right?

Hopefully everyone stays injury and illness free for the rest of the evening so I can feel a little less superstitious about stuff.

How I Loathe the End of a Weekend

There is so much going on at my job right now that even the shimmer of a glimpse of the workload has me holding my breath and feeling the panic rise.  Then I back away from the glimpse and remember to take it all one day at a time and I feel better.  Even writing those sentences was a little scary.  I'm losing sleep over it, which is annoying.

In the writing area of my life, I couldn't be happier.  If only I had more time, that is.  I've got a dozen writing goals and aspirations laid out in front of me and I'm thoroughly enjoying the idea of picking and choosing which of these enjoyable tasks I'd like to tackle each day and night.  I'm rereading the manuscript I finished for NaNoWriMo and tonight I got through an exceptionally well written chapter (obviously, this is my opinion, which could be complete crap along with the writing quality, but I've read a lot of books and I personally feel as though it has a lot of potential).  So my mood in the writing area of my life is very positive at the moment.

Unfortunately, my family life is on the verge of some kind of virus or bug.  My poor birthday girl (who turned one yesterday!  Can't get over the 'last year at this time' moments I've been having the past week) is sick.  She had a pretty yucky fever and was coughing a lot this evening, and I have a bad feeling that this is only the brink of the thing.  And who knows if the rest of us are doomed.  They say the flu vaccine is only 50% effective this year.  I sure hope that little girl feels better soon. It sucks to be a worrying mom...the shimmers of glimpses of worst case scenarios when my kids are sick or hurt give me shudders.

So I ran 4 miles today...I wanted to do more but my body wouldn't let me (I lie...it was really my brain convincing me that my body was the culprit).  Then tonight I did about 20 minutes worth of yoga.  Not much, but I feel much less achy, so it's a win.

Now on to some kind of writing?  Maybe not...I'm so exhausted.  If there is a bug in my system, brewing until its incubation period is all good and gone, I'm going to appreciate myself more if I got a good night sleep tonight.

So never mind, writing part of my day (I'm so sorry).  Good night.

NaNoWriMo Winner!!!!! :)

Yay!!! I did it!!! I finished my 50,016th word at Barnes n Noble yesterday afternoon during one of my regular writing times.  I was glad the month started on a Saturday and ended on a Sunday...kind of perfect for writing (especially for those of us with M-F jobs and children).  I'm so happy with what I've accomplished this month and though I know I have at least 30,000 more to go before I've completed the full novel, I feel totally confident that I will have my second full manuscript complete before the end of the year (that's my goal).

Thanks for keeping me accountable!

Day 25

I'm SO close!!!  I mean..I still have at least another twenty or thirty thousand words to write to finish this book, but still, 50,000 in a month is a feat.

Day 24

Woohoo, less than 10,000 words to go!  I can't believe how far I've come already.  It doesn't really feel like it was a sacrifice at all...which is great!

Day 23 - Back on track

I've caught back up and am a tiny bit ahead again.  Woohoo!  And we haven't even made it to the long weekend yet.  My office is closing on Wednesday at noon, so I plan on driving straight to Barnes and Noble to spend over four full hours there.  I'm pretty freakin excited about it.  I never count on afternoons like that though, anything could happen.  One of my daughters could get sick, I could get sick, some work thing could pop up...but I now have 3 flex days to take before the end of the year, so I'll keep that in mind if the afternoon doesn't work out.  I can just plan to take a day off the week after Thanksgiving.  Maybe I'll take that Monday off?

Time for bed for now...

Day 17

I'm really really loving this experience, and the book I'm working on.  Which at day 17 is probably a good sign.  Up until this month I've only ever tried writing young adult and this project is making me wonder if that's not the voice I'm meant to be writing.  It could just be the amount I'm writing everyday, but I've been thinking about my project a lot more throughout the day now than I remember doing with the last manuscript I wrote.  And I'm thinking about it like I think about a good book I'm reading.  I don't mean that to sound vein or presumptuous...I just feel like I'm connecting more with this type of writing than anything else I've done up until now.  So I'm excited to look back and reread what I've accomplished this month.

So here's yesterday's part 2:

And today's totals:

Day 16

I plan to stay up late tonight again and Steve goes on a work trip tomorrow so I should be able to make time to write after the kids go to bed for the next few nights.  I'm still on track...even if I did fall behind a little...

Day 15

Work and jewelry are my excuses.  But I'm busting my butt to get back on track, so cut me some slack...

Day 9 Parts 1 and 2

I had kind of an awesome day with the writing.  Hang on a second.  This may have been the fullest day I've had in every regard of my life, ever.  Recapping..I woke up (terrible night of sleep), made a list (detailed down to the time in which I needed to get everything done), started...
Nursed Abby
Picked out photos for Abby's spotlight board at daycare
Had breakfast and wrote for about 20 minutes
Went for a run with the dog (3.1 miles)
Took a shower
Vacuumed
Gave Abby an early lunch
Nursed Abby for her nap
Went to Barnes n Noble and wrote for an hour and a half
Went to Walmart to pick up the photos and other various items
Got home just in time for Steve to leave for work
Cleaned, mopped, put away dishes, made the spotlight board collage thing, folded clothes, got some finished jewelry sanded and fired in the kiln, nursed Abby, played with Jane, gave Jane a bath, helped Steve put away groceries he picked up on way home from work, pumped, ate dinner, nursed Abby for bedtime, finally sat down to read for fun (Unbroken...finally), half watched an episode of Homeland, then finished out the day with another 2 hours of writing.

Wow...

Part One:

 Part Two;

So now I'm going to bed.